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the PURPLE`IFIED


the EXITS


Lemon
Bananas
HCTT
bbears
mjvballers
Skye club comm

>>the MEMORIES

>>February 2005<<
>>March 2005<<
>>May 2005<<
>>June 2005<<
>>July 2005<<
>>August 2005<<
>>September 2005<<
>>October 2005<<
>>November 2005<<
>>December 2005<<
>>January 2006<<
>>February 2006<<
>>March 2006<<
>>April 2006<<
>>May 2006<<
>>June 2006<<
>>July 2006<<
>>August 2006<<
>>September 2006<<
>>October 2006<<
>>November 2006<<
>>June 2007<<
>>July 2007<<
>>January 2008<<
>>February 2008<<
>>April 2008<<
>>November 2008<<
>>January 2009<<
>>February 2009<<
>>March 2009<<



the THANKS((:

designer`leila-dawnn*
editing program`adobe photoshop 7.0
brushes`miss m

//Friday, April 21, 2006//2:17 AM

I can't help it, if I could, I'll have never develop anything for you. I'm sorry but I can't choose not too. I'm afraid it'll kill our friendship if I told you. I cannot lie to myself neither can I to you. I want our friendship to last. I know my feelings will never be reciprocated.

I'm depressed. You ask me wads my problem. I can't confide in you knowing that all my problems originated from you. I dun wanna add to your burden. You are stressed with everything around you, I've never stop being by your side to pick you up. I've never stop, never at all.

I'm always waiting for you. Waiting for you has been a hobby of mine. I know I'm done for when waiting turned into my hobby. Knowing that you'll go without me, leaving me in misery but I'll still wait. Stupid things I'll do for you. When can I stop? I've been wanting to catch up with your footsteps but you're just too fast - too fast ahead of me. I'll wait for the day you finally turn your head back and slow down your pace. I'm not sure how long I'll last, I don't think I can stand this torment for long.

I tried to avoid you but all in vain. It just makes me more miserable. I can't stand not seeing you at all. I can't stop thinking about you- you at your best and worst moments, I'm always there to see. But you never notice my presence, never at all. When will you ever learn to look back, to look at a tired me?

If liking you is equivalent to cheating our friendship, I'm sorry. Its not mine to control. I dont want that to happen too. If I can, I would rather I've not met you at all. The first day you should have never said hi, knowing that the hi you said would cause so much trouble afterwards. I'll never deepen our friendship knowing that it will only cause pain after that. NEVER!

I hate your smile. It never fails to melt my heart, only for me to know that I'll cry after that. I hate your kindness. Your kindness to me is indirectly killing my heart. You should have never shown me any kindness or given me any hope. Never at all! All the kindness and hope will only come back to haunt me. To haunt me for my stupidity ,for my foolishness.
If only you can see my pain. I wanna stop this mistake. This mistake that's gonna harm our friendship. Give me some time. I'm sure my wound will heal. Not only will I revive our friendship, I'll make sure I'll be coated with the strongest armour. I'm not gonna be so vulnerable again.
Not for you, not anymore.


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